At School

As an adolescent, you should make the most of your school years! This is a time of self-discovery and wonder, friendships, goal-setting, and personal growth. Enjoy it! Build relationships with your teachers; they spend as much time each day with you as your family, and they can be some of your strongest allies. Talk to them after class. Tell them about your interests or what challenges you in class. When you feel nervous or anxious, remember that your teachers are trained professionals that have dealt with many of the same difficulties that you’re experiencing. Ask them for advice. If you need help communicating with another student that you don’t get along with, see if your teacher would be willing to serve as a mediator to help you solve the problem. They will respect your honesty, and you’ll feel better for voicing your concerns. Being able to talk about your problems is an act of maturity. You are well on your way to becoming a strong, confident young adult!

At Home

Are you concerned about your home life? Does your home not look like your friends home? Is a caretaker raising you? All of these matters can produce high stress levels.

Family challenges can be tough. Unlike the volleyball team or a part-time job, you can’t quit or change your family when you feel overwhelmed. They’re always going to be a part of your life. When situations become too difficult to handle at home, that’s usually a sign that family members have lost track of their main priority: paying attention to each other’s needs through communication. Most challenges at home, if not solved altogether, can at least be improved by talking. You might feel lonely, disconnected from your Mom and Dad because you think they’ve been working too much. In their minds, though, they’re earning a good living so that they can buy you new sneakers, give you money to go to the movies with friends, or take a family vacation to Hawaii. As they work to feed, house, and clothe you, they might have lost track of the fact that you need them just as much as you need shoes. They won’t know how you feel, though, unless you talk to them. The same goes for all your family members. When a problem arises, remember that everyone in the house wants to be acknowledged and respected. Allowing everyone the chance to share their feelings reduces tension and creates an atmosphere of uniting to solve a common problem. Communication is one of the strongest tools available to build the family. Make sure you talk to your loved ones about what’s bothering you so that you can strengthen the ties that bind you.

With My Friends

Am I the same person around my friends as I am when I am alone> Who Am I? This tough question can increase your stress if you are constantly attempting to live up to the person who you really are not.

You will make many friends throughout your life, and you will bond with them for a variety of reasons. Some friends will connect with you over shared interests, such as sports, books, fashion, or computers. Others might bond with you because you’re funny, attractive, intelligent, or popular. Maybe you’ll draw people to you because you have a kind, thoughtful personality. Whatever the reason, you’re going to make friends throughout every stage of your life, from primary school to college, and from the workplace to houses of worship. Connecting with other people in a meaningful way is a wonderful experience, one that enriches our lives as human beings. For friendships to truly grow, however, they have to be built on honesty. Relationships can break down fairly easily when one person feels overpowered by another, or thinks that he has to hide his true self in order to connect with someone. Being honest with yourself is just as important as being honest with your friends. If you don’t want to drink beer Saturday at your friend’s birthday party, tell the truth. If you lie and go along with the crowd, you’ll feel trapped in a dishonest situation, and you’ll also have to lie to your parents when you get home. Who wants all that guilt? If your friends really care about you, they will respect your true feelings. If you have to lie to impress them, they’re not real friends anyway, so move on and find some better ones!

With My Parents

Do your parents have what you may consider, high expectations for you? Are they pressuring you to be the “success” that they feel they never were? Are you the first person in your family to head to college? These very real questions can create anxiety and stress within you. How you handle these true scenarios makes all the difference in your mental health status.

Parental expectations can get a little overwhelming. From the first day they learned they were going to have you, your parents began dreaming about you, your future, your happiness. They wondered if you’d be a girl or a boy. They hoped that you would be born healthy. They imagined everything from your first smile to the day you’d make them grandparents. They loved you and wanted everything to be perfect in your life. Unfortunately, their desire for perfection can create a lot of pressure for you! In the midst of all their expectations, sometimes parents can easily forget that you are your own person, complete with your own thoughts, ideas, and feelings. Communicating this to your parents can be challenging. Sometimes Moms and Dads have anxiety, too, fears that, if they don’t push you hard enough, you won’t succeed in life. Talk to them about their expectations and what you want for your future. How do you see your life progressing? What’s good about your situation and what do you feel needs improvement? If you explain to your parents that their wishes cause you to feel stressed out, they might just lighten up. If they see their expectations from your point of view – as causing more harm than good – this will help them rethink their approach so that you can peacefully pursue your goals.

My Thoughts

The journey from adolescence to young adulthood is going to trigger a whirlwind of changes in your life. Your voice will change. Your body will look different. You’ll grow closer to some friends and apart from others. All of these scenarios are natural, but they may cause you to have certain thoughts, feelings, or questions about your development. Don’t worry! Your private thoughts are natural, too.

As your hormones kick in, you might find yourself having ideas that never used to interest you before. If you’re a boy, all of sudden the girls that you’ve been in school with since kindergarten will start to look pretty to you. And if you’re a girl, the boys that used to have cooties in third grade will be the same ones you want to share a locker with! You might have thoughts and questions about boy-girl relationships, same sex relationships, or your own identity.

All of your questions, whether they’re related to school, family, peer groups, money, sexuality, or your health are normal. With an active young mind, it’s natural to question the world around you and your role in it. If your thoughts tend to stray toward darker feelings, however, it’s important to reach out and get help. It’s not okay to think about hurting yourself or committing suicide. These sorts of thoughts are outside the range of normal adolescent feelings, and if you’re having them, you need help to overcome them. Talk to your parents, teachers, or another trusted adult if you’re struggling with a negative self-image or thoughts of harming yourself. Your life is valuable and you deserve to be happy. Seek help as soon as possible so that you can find inner peace.